WTH Is That Thing?

There are many times I am wandering through a thrift store or an antique shop and I come across something that gives me pause. I look at it, pick it up, turn it over, all the while my brain is feverishly trying to figure out what the heck this thing was used for! It never ceases to amaze me when I find out the answer. Let me share a few oddities with you. Maybe some of you may say, “I already knew that!” but I think a few will be as stumped as me.

Let us start out slow. You can almost guess what this item was used for. Almost.  Is it a clamp? Then why does it have open grooves? It can’t be a clamp because when you separate the handle it opens and when you squeeze it, it tightens the tines. You can’t holdmanutranch 2 it together indefinitely … so it can’t be a clamp. It opens fairly wide so it was definitely made to go around something. An early hair implement? Any guesses? Take a look below. But I give fair warning, you will slap your forehead when you realize how simple this tool is and that someone felt the need for such succulent perfection.

Manutranch was this a big problem?
Manutranch was this a big problem?

Look at the multitude of meats that can be perfectly sliced!

This next picture makes me think of “War of the Worlds.” Why, you ask? Take a look at this space age thingy.

vintage juicer

Can’t you just see some little old lady, a cigarette hangs out of her mouth (before they were illegal in the work place), hunching over she pours molten metal into the cone. Pulling the lever with all her might, little metal objects extrude from the holes pinging off the bottom tray. Oh, by the way, I have a really good imagination. Because what this thing actually is (care to take a guess?) …

vintage juicer2

… is a juicer. Not what I was going for but, hey, they need juice in space. Right?! In case they run out of Tang.

Third on my list of WTH is this little number:

vegefrets

Anyone see that movie where all the metal spiders were attacking people? Tom Cruise or someone like that was the leading man? Oh well, either way, that is what this little item reminds me of.  Doesn’t it look like it would just walk off the counter the second you turn off the lights?  Crawl onto your bed before it bore into your ear and through your brain? Just saying. Too many “Blob” and “Invasion of the Body Snatchers” when I was a kid.

What this gadget actually does is it makes (insert drum roll here) …

vegefrets

French Fries – or any other veggie you want to make into a french fry shape.

cherry

What do you think this would be?

Would you believe a hole maker for belts when you need to add a new one? So would I … but that’s not it. How about a medieval torture device? Could be, it does look painful, but nope. Looks terrifying doesn’t it! That must mean it’s a dental instrument… no, not a dental tool.

What it is …

cherryp

A cherry pitter or stoner much like this one. Beats working it around with your teeth until you “elegantly” spit the cherry and part of the pulp into your hand. Definitely a useful little gadget!

cuber

Lastly, I have to add this one because it begs the question why. WTH is this?

Unless you’ve actually used one of these (and I wouldn’t be able to keep myself from wondering about you), you would never in a million years guess what this is.

It’s a square bottle looking thing with a round top that screws down and moves the platform inside downwards.

Did you guess? I bet you still didn’t come close to guessing that this is …

eggc

It pretty much speaks for itself, doesn’t it. Why, oh why, someone decided they needed their hard boiled eggs in the shape of a square is beyond me. What I find even more amazing is that a company felt there was real merit in the idea and marketed it. Who knew?!

Well, that is all I have for this week. I hope you have learned something and enjoyed my blog. Keep coming back for more. If you get a chance, check out my vintage store at Vintage Eve’s at Etsy. You never know what you’ll find. Have a great week!

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